HEARTBREAK

you are the best and the worst thing that could have possibly happened to me. no matter how much of a hard time i gave you, you deserved it. i hate you. i hate how you fucked this up, because even though you don't know it, i wanted it to work out as much as you did.

everything about you, and about us had the potential to be something insane. you had the power to make me feel so much.
there has never been a guy in my life that i've wanted to fight with so badly. i fought with you, cursed and yelled with you, because you were something i was passionate about.
every time you give me a reason to not to trust you, i let it slowly cut me and then i forgave you. i forgave you every time.

you actually made you way inside of me and made me feel vulnerable... it scared me more than anything.

maybe you couldn't see any of this, because i never showed it to you.

i wanted to forget all of the signs telling me you were wrong, forget about everything people said and expected of me, and go for it. but my brain wouldn't let me, and you have shown me that my brain was right.

i think about you a lot, every day, and it makes me mad how you continue to prove me right by being a child about everything.

it kills me how no matter how much i wanted you to just be mature enough to not screw me over, you couldn't do that. you stopped talking to me over something that you shouldn't even hold against me within the circumstances.

that's my weakness i guess, i can't stay mad at you. i can't back away from someone who everyone says doesn't deserve to be in my life at all.

I HATE YOU SO MUCH, AND I MISS YOU LIKE HELL.

it feels like your heart is being shredded to pieces, cut up, and thrown in the trash, left to rot. it hurts a lot, emotionally and physically.

getting heart broken actually makes your heart physically hurt.

you cry and cry and wish it wasn't like that. you wish it was just a temporary nightmare. but, the sad truth? it's not. it's reality. and you're going to just have to accept it, the pain and all.

sumber gambar: tumblr & we heart it. sumber tulisan: tumblr. :)